The birth of The Menopause Club.

I didn’t realise just how bad menopause could be until the day my team sat me down for an intervention.  The room had been set up and I had the main-stage.  I was seated on a single chair facing them and they were seated around me in a semicircle.  8 beautiful faces looking rather nervous. The spotlight was on me.   I knew exactly what was coming.  I had turned into a monster.  I was unbearable to work with, my mood swings were frequent and unpredictable.  I was unable to control myself.   In short, I had become a complete and utter nightmare to work with.

They first gave me a nice ice cold beer, and then someone started with, “Dez, we are doing this because we are concerned and care about you, but also,  we can’t work like this anymore!”

I suspected I was probably going through menopause at the time because I had the worst hot flushes imaginable, I was constantly drenched in sweat, mainly in the nape of my neck and down my back. But I thought, that’s all that menopause was.   That’s all I had ever heard about it.  Menopause = hot flushes and eventually also the end of your period (Hooray!!!).

Did I have it wrong…..

No one told me about the total loss of emotional control, angry outbursts for the smallest reasons, no patience, no sleep, sore joints, total loss of libido, memory loss, unable to focus on anything, deep deep utter inexplicable sadness paired with dark thoughts  - and well, the list goes on…

I turned everywhere in the healthcare sector for help and was sent away many times, I gave up and then over the years desperately tried again and again. I was told to deal with it as it is normal and things will get better.  I had visited more than one GP in that time (all women) and shockingly that was of no use, they’d be happy to send me to a psychologist, but not to the local menopause clinic because that wasn’t for mental health issues (what?!!! and really?!!!).  Eventually I completely burned out, could not get out of bed any more, could not stop crying, I could no longer perform my very demanding job to the level that was expected, I had been running on empty for years at this point and eventually, inevitably, I was politely shown the Workplace exit. 

I believe this all could have been avoided if I had understood what was happening in my body and if someone in the healthcare sector would just have listened to my cries for help.  There is just so little awareness around Menopause! 

If I can help just one person to avoid this happening to them, I would be eternally grateful.  So I started researching, studying, listening to many many podcasts, reading, ranting, raving, sometimes procrastinating and suddenly here I am today, starting my own business. I knew I wanted to do it, but I didn’t dare to do it.   Recently during one of the courses I was attending a lovely human told me, “just start somewhere and take it from there” it’s as simple as that……so here I am, starting somewhere…..Terrified of failure, terrified of not getting it perfectly right…..utterfly terrified… and also utterly utterly excited!!!  

So Everyone:  Welcome (officially) to The Menopause Club!

Officially registered today at the Chamber of Commerce in Amsterdam.

KvK number:  42073345

Watch this space and please do not hesitate to reach out if you want more info!!!

And most importantly SPREAD THE WORD!